Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I shake my fist at you, Mormons


Everyone knows by now what an asshole the Mormon Church is when it comes to The Gay. But now, it seems that they've also been disrespecting another group.....(wait for it)....Jews!!! And not just any Jew, oh no. Turns out that the Mormons have decided to specifically hate on DEAD HOLOCAUST JEWS.

Yeah. Apparently they believe that Mormons can only be reunited in the afterlife with other Mormons. They also believe that it's not too late for your dead relatives to become Mormons, too, so that you can see them again. So they have a church member "stand in" for your dead relative during a baptism. They believe that by doing this, the stiff can then choose Mormonism and go to heaven for punch and cookies for all eternity.

The Mormons are also crazy for genealogy records. So they have a big-ass database with a bunch of names. In this database are the names of a bunch of dead Jewish Holocaust victims. So, it turns out, they've been taking the names of the dead Jews and baptizing them in the name of the Mormon Church.

So let's get this straight. You're a Jew. You are taken to a death camp, tortured, and killed because you are a Jew. Then, 70 years after you die, some self-righteous Christians ignore your religion, ignore the suffering that you endured for your religion, and claim your soul as a member of their religious group??

This is a huge insult to Holocaust victims, survivors, and their relatives. Basically, the Mormon Church is saying "We're right and Jews are wrong. So we're going to just go ahead and make them Mormons." It trivializes the entire Jewish religion. It's disgusting.

As it turns out, in 1995 the Mormon Church had agreed to stop this practice, and removed a number of names from the database. But someone who was keeping tabs on them discovered that Jewish names have been continually resubmitted and added to the database since that time.
The Church's defense for this blatant violation is a kicker. A spokesman said that the names were added by a small-group of "well-meaning" Mormons. Oh, fuck you. Fuck your intentions. That doesn't make any of this okay. Your intentions may have been good but the effect is horribly offensive. And the effect is the only thing that matters here.

The even sadder part of the story is that the Jewish people who have been decrying the Mormons' actions are basically giving up. The initial agreement has been violated for 13 years, so simply removing names from the database obviously isn't enough. So the Jews are tired and aren't negotiating with the Mormons anymore. It's basically like this:

Mormons: *Punches Jew in the face*
Jews: Ow! Quit it!
Mormons: Oh, sorry, I thought that it would be good for you. *punches Jew again*
Jews: That hurts! Please stop!
Mormons: Ok, I'll stop. *Punches Jew in balls*
Jews: Fine. I'm walking away.
Mormons: *Follows Jew, repeatedly punches Jew in back of head*

It kills me that Mormons are so nice to your face, and then they turn around and do shit-head things like this. No regard whatsoever for any group but themselves. They will cry all night about respect for their rights and their religion, but they don't give a flying fuck about gay rights or respect for other religions. I don't know how anyone who believes in being a loving person could EVER support an organization like LDS.

My only consolation is that I think this whole thing is ridiculous because A) I don't believe in souls, so the fact that the Mormons take this whole posthumous baptism thing seriously is fucking laughable and B) it's funny to see people waste so much energy and life because they think they're going to go somewhere after they die. Hey, Mormons: Just enjoy your fucking life and quit wasting your time making other people miserable. Because I bet you dollars to donuts that when you die, you ain't going nowhere but six feet under. And you won't hear your relatives' damn baptisms down there, either. So just abstain from your coffee and tea and leave the rest of us the fuck alone.

3 comments:

White Trash Academic said...

I always talk to these guys everytime they come to my door. Basically, I engage them nicely but trap them with logic. When trapped with logic, they fall back on God's will or the word of God.

It's fun sometimes, but other times it is maddening. I only do this because I am a big old softy and I feel bad for the boys (no girls, of course) who spend 2 years of their life doing nothing but studying and going door to door.

Seth R. said...

Jewish holocaust survivors were removed from the database you mentioned.

Part of the agreement in 1995 between a Holocaust survivor group and the LDS Church was that names of survivors would be removed from the general database of names any Mormon can perform ordinances for. But that DIRECT DESCENDANTS of those survivors would still be able to do such ordinances on behalf of their own ancestors.

Until recently, the technology wasn't there to effectively police this, and some Mormons, acting on their own personal initiative, continued to submit such names to the database. When such names were discovered by the LDS Church, they were removed. Recently, new technology is being implemented that will make tracking this kind of stuff easier to do and hopefully, less names will slip through the cracks.

Another clarification:

Doing a temple baptism for a dead person DOES NOT MAKE THEM A MORMON.

Got that?

Not a Mormon.

All it does is perform the ordinance, which the dead person can choose to either accept or reject (yes, we do believe that dead people are still beings capable of making choices - get over it).

So for all I know, my great, great, great grandfather that I was baptized for all those years ago, never accepted the baptism, and thinks I'm a deluded idiot for believing what I do.

And that's his call. All I'm doing is offering the option.

This Mormon practice should not be any more offensive to people than someone from another faith offering a prayer on their behalf.

If you don't believe in it, fine. I guess it won't have any effect will it? But either way, it's completely voluntary. We aren't adding these dead people to our membership rolls. We're just keeping track of who's had the work done. That shouldn't bug people any more than a pair of Mormon missionaries checking off which houses in a neighborhood they've already visited.

Phoebe Caulfield said...

Seth:
Jewish holocaust survivors were removed from the database you mentioned.

Yes, they did remove names, and yet failed to prevent re-submitting or adding names after that (as you mentioned). But I REFUSE to believe that they were not capable of preventing this before just this very year. What it amounts to is a lack of concern for keeping those names out of the list. They should have figured that out in 1995.

Doing a temple baptism for a dead person DOES NOT MAKE THEM A MORMON.
Ok, I stand corrected. But as the CNN article mentions, the whole practice has the potential to "re-write" the religious affiliations of holocaust survivors and play into the hands of holocaust deniers. Read the link. It's still a problem.

This Mormon practice should not be any more offensive to people than someone from another faith offering a prayer on their behalf.
See, that's the thing. A lot of people, including me, DO find offering unsolicited prayers on one's behalf offensive. Because it basically says "I believe that your beliefs/actions are inferior to mine." It trivializes the beliefs of the person that you are praying for, and shows a lot of disrespect.

(yes, we do believe that dead people are still beings capable of making choices - get over it)

You can talk to dead people all you want. You just need to respect how far you go in presuming to be so "right" that you complete steamroll other religions. Especially heavily-persecuted ones.

The bottom line is, the Mormon Church showed a lack of urgency for fixing their database. And they showed disrespect to the victims of the Holocaust. And that is wrong.

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