The end of an era

...Sort of? I have not been without a job since I was 14 years old. I have been known to keep two jobs at once. And yet, after an unfortunate and traumatizing incident with graduate school (see comments section in "Epiphany!") , I have been unemployed for almost four months. There has been much mooching off of the Boyfriend, which has made my feminist self very unhappy.

Some good things came out of the Great Unemployment, like this blog. And a close and personal bond with my pet bunny (he's litter trained AND he responds to voice command. That's good bondin'). But now, thankfully, it's time to move off of my crumb-encrusted couch, turn off my Simpsons season 4-7 DVDs, and put my pants back on (if I can find them). Because today I accepted a job offer.

Because I want to keep my blog as anonymous as possible, and because I want to avoid getting Dooced (although that worked out well for her in the end, didn't it?), I probably won't reveal much about my working life. I guess I can say that I'm involved in academia, and that it involves Psychology, because I've already revealed that much in past entries. And it helps to know that information in order to understand my extreme nerdiness.

But I promise that even though eight hours of my day will soon be consumed by other activities, you can rest assured that I will still have an endless supply of things to write about ENTIRELY IN CAPS LOCK BECAUSE IT MAKES ME SO FUCKING MAD. Because those things never go away.

Plus, if I use this blog as an outlet, I have a lesser risk of alienating my future co-workers with insane ranting. Or maybe, if I get really lucky, my co-workers will be just as crazy as me, and we can rant together, like a bevy of homeless schizophrenic bag-ladies.

I don't start for a few weeks, but I'm celebrating today anyway. I'm going out, putting a new coat and hat (I want a cloche!) and boots on my already-bloated credit card, and then buying me a Max Brenner hot chocolate, because that shit is DE-FUCKING-LICIOUS. What now, Economy? What now?

Epiphany!

So I was thinking about Amelia Bedelia, as we all do from time to time. And then I realized!!! Amelia Bedelia falls on the autism spectrum! How could I have overlooked this?! She takes everything literally...figures of speech and metaphors are lost on her! Symptom of autism/aspergers!

Okay, this is a major pitfall of having a degree in Psychology (um, aside from unemployment and a lifetime of low pay, I mean. Don't get smart). You can't stop diagnosing. Fictional children's characters included. Realizing this ACTUALLY excited me. I really do belong in grad school, with the other nerds (but alas, grad school is reserved for those with trust funds. At least, the sole program that I got into was. Damn you, ivory tower!!!).

Remember the time Amelia Bedelia was supposed to trim the x-mas tree, so she cut the branches off instead of decorating it? And then she made a date cake by cutting up the calendar into the batter? Good times, Amelia. Good times.